I Married A Slob - Lyrics & Chords
Lyrics & Music - David Andrew Johnson
Lyrics
INTRO VAMP
(spoken)
Y'all ready for me to tell you a little story? Hahahahaha
Well this story was told to me
by a nice little woman who lives on my block
And believe it or not
I'm gonna try and sing it for you
using the exact same words
she used to tell me
about the big ol' mess she got herself in.
You ready, . . well here we go!
V1
We first met, and I knew there was, po-ten-tial in THIS man
He cleaned up, so ver-y nice, my heart was in his hands
The on-ly thing, much quick-er than, my lit-tle beat-ING heart,
Was how quick, he could tear, a nice clean house a-part
Pre-CHORUS
Little Jane chose danger n' Tarzan
and I feel for those poor women,
who marry into the mob
But I got myself, in a bigger mess
I Married a Slob.
CHORUS
She Married a Slo-o-ob, I married a slob
She Married A Slo-o-ob, it's a full time job
When you marry a slob
V2
The TV remote, and the, porce-lin seat, only things he can't PUT down
Ev'rything else, find it's way, to my floor or to the ground
Staining the driveway, wor-ries him, but oh not the bathROOM hair
It looks like, three big chimps, showered and shaved in there
Pre-CHORUS
Little Jane chose danger n' Tarzan
and I feel for those poor women,
who marry into the mob
But I got myself, in a bigger mess
I Married a Slob.
CHORUS
She Married a Slo-o-ob, I married a slob
She Married A Slo-o-ob, it's a full time job
When you marry a slob
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BRIDGE
He tells me he a-dores me
and the kids love him so
But if our son starts to act like him
they both have to go!
(ad lib, spoken) In Geraldine's house, you gonna pick up after yourself, killer!
Solo/Verse
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V3
The garage is packed, the junk he saves, is purely a WONder
Did some digging, oh look what I found, Jimmy Hoffa under
CHORUS
She Married a Slo-o-ob, I married a slob
She Married A Slo-o-ob, it's a full time job
When you marry a slob
Outro
When you marry a slob
When you marry a slob
When you marry a - (spoken) aw c'mon pick that up - slob!
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Chords for I Married A Slob:
It's a simple song to learn.
Intro Vamp: E -/////////- A B
VER: E G#m A B A B
pre-CH:
A B E
A B E G#m
A B A E
CH: B A E, -/- , B E
BR: C#m D A, B D E
OUTRO: repeating E's
Songwriter - Lyrics & Music, and All Instruments and Vocals performed by David Andrew Johnson
“I MARRIED A SLOB” 
Copyright 2013 David Andrew Johnson, all rights reserved
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Guitar Pointers For The Struggling, from The Struggling!
- Learn where all the 1's (Root note A's) are in the Key of A, and it will unlock the fretboard for you.
- Don't like Barr Chords. Can't play 'em. Well, learn to play your open E Chord using your middle, ring-finger, and pinky. Get that into your muscle memory, and you will be playing a Bb major or minor Chord at the 6th fret in no time flat.
- Put a strap on your acoustic guitar and walk all around the house while you're playing your songs. Don't look at the neck. Look out the window like you're singing to a big audience!
- For two minutes a day, practice playing notes across and up and down the neck with only your ring-finger and pinky. Want your pinky to play cooler chords and faster solo notes? Than put that little nibblet on a workout routine to make it stronger and more coordinated.
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